I was disvirgined by a girl when i was still in the secondary school at ss2

AM A GIRL of 21.I was disvirgined by a girl when i was still in the secondary school at ss2.She was a family friend dor older than me.I left secondary skul 2007 and our affair started 2005.She wasn't in the same secondary school with me and i made out with no other both in my school or at home because i was deeply inlove with her.Its was intresting and i enjoyed the whole relationship sincerely speaking.By 2007 she got married to a man forced by her parents because of his wealth.By then i was done with secondary school.We met in a supermarket ending of that year 2007,i was soo happy to see her we huged,kissed...we both were soo happy then we got talking and She asked me to come over to her house which i refused because sincerely its not gona be easy for me resisting her cos i know dor married,i still love her and want to have her again.Because of my respect for marriage i refused and honestly since then till date,making out with a girl has been hard for me;COS SHE DISVIRGINED me FIRST and because the makeing out was soo mind blowing i felt no other girl will treat me as loving as she did.Finally by 2009 i madeout with my first guy dor am still with guys for camouflage but i still have this inner desire for the ladies and i get sexually high watching mojo of two ladies unlike that of a lady and a guy.Dor presently i have a boyfriend but am still attracted to the ladies.The END